Daydreaming

Our weather is so strange now.  Today is supposed to be 70 and sunny after the fog (which we rarely have and I love!) dissipates.  Tomorrow 74 and sunny.  These warm summer-like days are a delight but throw me off.  They tease me into thinking that it is going to stay this warm from now on without any chillier days/nights, which isn't how it will be.  My heart yearns to be back at the lake, and I may go there tomorrow just to dip my toes back into the life that Randy and I lived there.  There is so much work to be done there, and I have to go back for lengthy periods of time this summer to get some of that done, but for right now, I just need to BE there, even for a few hours.  

I have noticed that I am having more anxiety to deal with in the last month or two.  Is this a normal occurrence after the ordeal that was last year?  I don't know, but it does make it harder for me to spontaneously do things, go places, just get in the car and drive now without a lot of over-thinking.  I am hoping that the more I force myself to do the things that cause me anxiety, that it will lessen over time.  This last year changed me in so many ways, both outwardly and inwardly, that I hardly recognize myself right now.