December 30th Our 25th Wedding Anniversary

So, today marks 25 years of our commitment to each other.  The last four years for have been a kind of turbulent that I could never have imagined, and especially this year that is drawing to a close.  Dissension and hostility on both parts have marked this last few days.  R will be released from Rehab on Thursday, with home health.  He was seen and treated at Wound Care by Dr. Greenfield who is a wound care specialist, but is also a thoracic surgeon.  He did surgically removed dead tissue from all of the wounds, but did what I call an excavation on one of the wounds on R's left foot, and ordered that he have a Wound Vac attached.  He does have cellulitis in both feet.  We have no idea how long he will have this device attached to this wound, but I've been even more insistent that we stay in Kingsport at least for the 4-6 weeks that Home Health Nurses will be coming, every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.  He's insisting that he is going home---with or without me.  I have told him to go---and let me know how that is working out for him.  Total Impasse.  Happy Anniversary.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas Wishes, everyone!

R Update

Tomorrow will be a week that R has been in the rehab facility.  He will be staying there until January 3.  Yes, Christmas and New Year's.   It seems he takes one step forward and 3 steps back.  He felt really bad yesterday and today.  He had a  couple of days when his legs weren't so swollen and weeping.  The wounds are slowly healing , but today his legs were weeping really bad again and he's very swollen.  I'm sure they will have to give him lasix again, and that will put more strain on his kidneys.  I feel so bad for him, and sad, and I'm trying so hard to keep his spirits up.  He's depressed over being there, and especially so because of the holidays.  He becomes very frustrated by all of it, and especially his inability to get his legs to work.  He said they feel like he has weights attached to them.  Between the cellulitis and the renal failure,  his body is having to fight so hard.  He's a very sick man, and this is such a vast, scary landscape that we find ourselves in. 

Update

R was finally transferred to the rehab facility yesterday evening .  He was surprisingly compliant with the move.  I think he is in the right place for him as they have skilled nursing, wound care, and three hours of physical therapy a day.   However, I'm as concerned about his mental abilities now as the other physical issues.  He seems more like himself earlier in the day,  but day draws into evening it's almost like he has sun downers syndrome.  So scary.  He qualifies for a 20 day stay under Medicare. 

Marlee and I are still with my sister, but had cleaners in the rental house yesterday,  and we started taking a few necessities in today.  We may spend our first night there tomorrow night. 

Really? It's December 12th? Really???

R has been in the hospital in a city an hour away from our home since Monday, December 3.  He is still in the hospital, and will be transferred to a physical therapy rehab facility tomorrow.  He may be there 3 days or 3 weeks.  I am hoping and praying for the longest time possible in hopes that he will recover some of his physical body strength, and that his open wounds will completely heal with the help of daily wound care and long-term antibiotics.  He has a yeast infection (candida) which the doctor says is hard to get---and hard to heal.  He also has a form of a strep infection, but not the kind associated with strep throat.  He has a bacterial infection in the wounds on his feet and right leg.  He is very weak, and is extremely wobbly in trying to walk on his own.  He is definitely a fall risk.  I am so relieved that I can't even put it into words that he will be cared for by professionals for some period of time.  I am emotionally and physically drained to the point of being functional, but just barely.

I have been at one of my sisters' houses in the same city that the hospital and rehab facility are located in. She has been pampering me and nurturing me and giving me tender loving care.  We got 10" of snow this past Sunday.  It snowed ALL DAY.  I was so relieved to be here at my sister's since we were snowed in on Monday.  Marlee and I have been here since last Wednesday (December 5) and will be here until this Friday (December 14) when Marlee and I will go to a house that we own as a rental property that is vacant right now.  We will make this our camp base for the time that R is in this city.  After R is released from the rehab facility, then we will have to make some decisions about where we will be for the next 3 winter months.  He wants to return to our remote (location) home...me, not so much.  I'm afraid I will need help with him that may not be able to get to us because of possible inclement weather and the horrendous road we live on.

So, this is where we are right now.  Just Going....One day at a time, one foot in front of the other, making each decision as it arises...